No, I am not asking you to play better than your children in tournaments. Most of you will not. Even some of you do now, your children will catch up quickly and become much better than you.
Other than being a role model, I am inviting you to experience the tournaments by yourselves, feel the pressure in your games, and then you could understand your children much better.
I remember one story a few years ago. At the annual Amateur Team tournaments, there was a team of a couple of chess kids, who were already very good and all became masters later. When they lost some games, their dads were talking like "How could you play so badly?", "If I had been taught for as many years as you do and had spent the money as you do, I would already be a GM." Sometimes some kids would challenge back, "then you go there play." So one year, 5 dads took the challenge and got their own team, and confidently entered the arena. Their average rating was not shabby, around 1400. But after they sat down at the board, everything changed. They were shaking, they were sweating, they blundered, they lost game after game, and the team rank went down again and again. After that incident, the dads gave much less negative talks.
In a chess tournament, your child is under tremendous pressure. Anything can happen, reasonable or unreasonable. Please understand your child. Your child needs encouragement, not judgement.
Other than being a role model, I am inviting you to experience the tournaments by yourselves, feel the pressure in your games, and then you could understand your children much better.
I remember one story a few years ago. At the annual Amateur Team tournaments, there was a team of a couple of chess kids, who were already very good and all became masters later. When they lost some games, their dads were talking like "How could you play so badly?", "If I had been taught for as many years as you do and had spent the money as you do, I would already be a GM." Sometimes some kids would challenge back, "then you go there play." So one year, 5 dads took the challenge and got their own team, and confidently entered the arena. Their average rating was not shabby, around 1400. But after they sat down at the board, everything changed. They were shaking, they were sweating, they blundered, they lost game after game, and the team rank went down again and again. After that incident, the dads gave much less negative talks.
In a chess tournament, your child is under tremendous pressure. Anything can happen, reasonable or unreasonable. Please understand your child. Your child needs encouragement, not judgement.
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